Category: family and friends

What a Cochlear Implant is NOT

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and What It IS!

My sister happened to be in town this past week for a meeting. She lives in the Ft. Worth area, and I only get to see her once a year if I’m lucky!

I’m sure you can tell from the picture that she is my baby sister, and is a great deal younger than I. Although we do not know each other like we did when we were growing up, we still have a lot of history growing up on a ranch in southeastern Colorado. In spite of distance and busy lives, nothing changes the fact that we are sisters.

Since I lost my hearing over a long period of time, and since my family is spread out all over the U.S., most did not realize or understand what the annual changes in my hearing loss actually meant. It came as rather a surprise to them I believe when I could no longer talk on the phone to them, and an even bigger surprise when they learned I planned to get a cochlear implant.

I don’t consider myself a “poor communicator” and yet sometimes I communicate certain things very poorly. I think that sometimes because my immediate family and I know so much about hearing loss, that the people in my life also know a great deal of information about hearing loss. Since I was sort of also classified as “the whiner” in my family growing up, I also think that this affected the way I chose to relay information about my progressive hearing loss. As I acquired the disability of hearing loss over time as an adult, I worked extra hard at keeping how difficult the transition was for me to go from a person with normal hearing to a person who couldn’t hear at all.

One of these days I’m going to have to hammer out a book or something. There would likely be some chapters that even my immediate family might be surprised at… things that I kept between myself and God.

My sister loves me and I love her. But Diane doesn’t understand hearing loss. She has her own family, job, friends and LIFE. It’s difficult to research and discover things about something that seems “fuzzy” to you… something that you don’t clearly understand, when it isn’t happening to you. So I don’t fault the question she asked when we were talking this past week. I think it’s a question that many people think, but just don’t ask. Taking advantage of the fact that we are sisters and that she is not the type to sit around wondering when she can just ask… she point blank asked me,

“So? If you have a cochlear implant now, why do you need a dog? Didn’t that (as she gestured towards my CI and bling) fix you?”

I think many people think a CI “fixes” your hearing. They may think that now that you have a cochlear implant, you have perfect hearing and are “normal”. I realize that most people talk about how things are different by discussing things “alike” first… followed by how things are “different”. However, since I believe there are many misconceptions about CI’s, I wanted to start with what they are NOT.

What it’s NOT:

1. A cochlear implant does not make you Jamie Sommers. You are not the Bionic Woman (or man) and can hear things 4.2 miles away.

2. A cochlear implant does not make you a lightening rod. Someone with a cochlear implant is not more likely to be struck by lightening than someone else. Sure! If you are playing outside in a lightening storm on a hill without cover, holding a golf club in your hands then yes… you might be hit by lightening. But it’s not because you have a cochlear implant in your head.

3. A cochlear implant does not provide crystal clear hearing where the recipient never has to say “huh?” again.

4. A cochlear implant’s magnetic coil is not a “plug”. I realized my sister must have thought this when she winced as I took it off to show her. There is not an opening to your brain, it doesn’t “plug in” like a cord in an electrical socket. There are no gruesome wires or frankensteinish types of protruding pieces of metal.

5. A cochlear implant does not make someone begin to have balance problems… usually. I have heard that it can happen, and that is why good surgeons always run a battery of tests which include ways to detect if you have vertigo problems already. I have always been “dizzy” (though never blond) and I almost failed the tests at Johns Hopkins on vertigo. I have a mild version of Meniere’s disease, and looking back I think it began at around 18 years old. I did not begin losing my hearing until I was 25. I have a history of accidents a mile long. Every emergency room doctor knows me by name. I break bones, fall a great deal, and run into things. I actually have no memory of NOT being this way. Growing up I was told I was “clumsy”. My CI didn’t make me dizzy. I was already dizzy.

6. A cochlear implant does not allow you to hear every kind of environmental sound. There are still things I don’t hear at all, or don’t hear well.

What it IS:

1. A cochlear implant is a bionic prosthesis type of device surgical implanted into your cochlear array. One is “mapped” frequently in the beginning (sort of like being programmed) and then usually once a year for life after receiving one. Each mapping allows adjustments to enable you to hear things more clearly, and electrodes are tested and checked.

2. A cochlear implant can be worn anywhere except in water. One cannot scuba dive after receiving a CI (due to pressure). My particular implant device, the Nucleus Freedom, is “splash resistant”. I can get caught in a rain storm without an umbrella, or hop into the shower accidentally without removing it and not destroy it. Certainly, should those things happen I would promptly put it in my Dry ‘n Store (an electronic drying device), nor would I ever do those things on purpose. I mean I DO shower on purpose, but I don’t jump into the shower with my CI on with the intent of destroying it. (In hindsight in writing this I thought I should assure my readers that I DO shower, and do so ON PURPOSE).

One can swim with a CI, but not with the outside components attached. Water tends to ruin them. As long as you are not scuba diving, you can still enjoy swimming, snorkeling, and rain showers. You just “play smart” and take care of the device that houses the controller, etc.

3. A cochlear implant allows you to hear again… when you have reached the point that you no longer can. Hearing again and “hearing perfectly” are two different things. One doesn’t grouch that they aren’t “normal” when they can hear after they could NOT. I can talk on the phone now (in a quiet room with my own phone), I can hear in church, talk to people face-to-face and in small groups. I do not do well in restaurants, large groups, concerts, etc., without special assistance from infra-red or FM assistive listening devices. A “loop” is my favorite way to hear in these “tough” environments. You walk into the room, switch your CI to t-coil, and you “hear” without the background noise.

4. The magnetic coil of my implant connects to another magnet securely embedded in my skull. The magnets connect very well through my skin. Nothing shows, and I try very hard to not appear “gorey”. Grin! I’m rather proud of the fact, that I’m probably one of the few people I know who can lean into the refrigerator and “lose” their ears.

Weirdest place I ever lost my CI? At the grocery story in the pickle isle. I was leaning down to try and find the specific type of pickles my family likes, and “whoosh” off my CI went to connect to the metal lid of a pickle jar. As I was desperately looking for my CI, a lady came by and smiled and said,

“Are you pregnant honey? Looking for pickles?”

I was so astonished that I replied, “No! I’m looking for my ear!”

Needless to say she shrieked and ran.

5. A cochlear implant can sometimes mask tinnitus… another common symptom and side effect of progressive hearing loss. It is a “hum” or ringing sound in your ears. The CI can mask this effect and keep you from hearing it. I have also met some people, however, who now have tinnitus (when they remove their CI) and they did not have it before.

I’m use to the ringing. When I take my CI off at night the ringing begins. But it isn’t bothersome for me, and I go right to sleep. When hearing the ringing, I no longer shout, “Hello? Who’s there?”

6. My cochlear implant and my CI experience is not like anyone else’s. Everyone who has a CI has a unique experience. I still hear new things everyday. But my experience, what I can hear and not hear, is as unique as my “map”. No two recipients are alike. I think that is why I think an audiologist specializing in CI’s would be such a fascinating job!

I hope my little “list” has helped!

Denise Portis
©2007 Hearing Loss Diary


Between a Rock and a Hard Place

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Between a Rock and a Hard Place

I’ve had a tough week. I’m “stuck between a rock and a hard place”.

If I’ve had a really busy week with a great deal going on, I don’t consider that a tough week.

When I spend a week “butting heads” with two wonderful but “learning to be independent” teenagers who just happen to belong to me, I don’t consider that a tough week.

If I have a week where I rarely seem to see my often over-worked husband, I don’t consider that a tough week.

I didn’t even consider the week that our dishwasher quit washing, our attic ventilation fan… quit (ummm…) venting, and our doggie door quit opening to allow a canine who really needed to GO, a tough week! (Ok, ok! That was a pretty TOUGH week!)

But I just experienced a week where I felt like I really didn’t belong… ANYWHERE. Sometimes it’s really tough to be late-deafened. I hate to complain, and to me the worst thing a person with an acquired disability can do is to whine about their life! I much prefer to look on the “bright side”. I want to be the kind of person who helps others, and who sees the glass as “half full”. Besides, I really believe that you cannot make a difference to other people if you don’t have the right attitude! I desperately want to make a difference!

“Stuck between a rock and a hard place”

In my classes, we often discuss the meaning of English idioms and colloquial expressions. When translating phrases like these, it is best to translate the meaning… not the words. So I’m often digging in and trying to discover what some of the phrases that we use a great deal actually mean. Phrases like “stuck between a rock and a hard place”, require some investigation. One online phrase dictionary explains that it means: “forced to make a choice between two equally undesirable options.”

I feel “stuck between a rock and a hard place”. I don’t “belong” in either population group! My daughter (who is almost 18 years old), told me several years ago that she was really hurt when I would say, “You can’t understand. You’re a hearing person”. She said that it made her feel as if she were another species; that I was somehow claiming we weren’t even the same flesh and blood. She reminded me that I’m her mother and that she’s my daughter. Whatever level of hearing your ears has — doesn’t change that. (Geesh, sometimes kids can be pretty smart!)

Even though she is RIGHT, the fact remains that I am neither a person with normal hearing, nor am I Deaf. I am deaf (with a small “d”) and cannot hear in a conventional way. Yet I am not Deaf (with a capital “D”) which means that I am not culturally Deaf and use sign language as my primary means of communicating.

I’ve had a tough week. (I’m getting redundant, aren’t I?) I have been gently arguing the case of my peers… to an organization in Frederick County who will only provide services and assistance to groups who are culturally Deaf. If you don’t sign, you are “up a creek”, basically. I can’t go into a lot of detail because of the type of folks who “happen across my blog”. Being married to whom I’m married to keeps me from speaking my mind on my very own blog sometimes. I’m ok with those parameters, as it has probably kept me from saying something I shouldn’t! Suffice it to say that it has been made very clear to me this week that I am not “Deaf enough”. I’ve the email exchanges to prove it.

I have discovered that wearing visible reminders of my hearing loss usually helps me. I wear my hair up so that people can see my cochlear implant bling, and bright red/orange hearing aid ear mold. However, if I’m not going to class, church, Bible study, or to school, I have to wear my hair down to cover all of that up. There are a great number of Deaf in Frederick. Most of the time I love it, and have met some wonderful people. Talking with them helps my receptive skills! But most of the time those visible reminders draw some pretty sharp criticisms. I’ve been cussed out (in sign), called names, and been talked about and belittled by Deaf parents to their children. Cochlear implants and the choice to remain in the hearing world is not a very popular thing to do in my area. Certainly I have met some Deaf who treat me like a normal person, and are glad that I even sign. Sometimes, they are only confused and after discovering I sign, ask “What’s wrong with being Deaf? Why did you change that?” After explaining that my cochlear implant allows me to stay in the hearing world in which I was born, that it enables me to communicate the way I was first taught language, and it allows me to interact with my hearing family, they concede it was “right for me”.

The same day I received the final email from this organization that I am trying to “gently persuade”… asking that they help my group of people who are oral with hearing loss, I was shopping in Target. I stopped to look at some clothing, when a mother with a daughter who looked to be about 10 years old, walked around me to a rack of clothing next to where I was standing. I heard the daughter ask, “Mom, why does that lady have a dog with her? She can see!”

I didn’t turn to look right away as the mother immediately replied, “the dog’s vest says it’s a hearing dog. She sure is cute! I wish we could ask to pet her, but the Deaf don’t speak well enough to understand. They don’t like hearing people”. By having a hearing dog it automatically meant that I wasn’t “like them”. I couldn’t be talked too in a normal way. It meant that I was “mean”.

I know I must have stiffened, because Chloe turned to look at me as if to say, “Excuse me? Why are you so tense?” I think because I had just received the kind of email that made me feel like I didn’t belong with the “popular” hearing loss community, I felt like I’d been struck in the face. I realized I don’t belong in the hearing world either. (You can’t hear the wail in my voice right now, but believe me it’s there!) I can’t simply be a person with hearing loss who hears better with a cochlear implant, and lives more independently due to the fact that I pay attention to a dog trained to hear for me.

I know the mother and daughter were very shocked when I turned to scoot by them and calmly said, “Excuse me! ‘Chloe, FOLLOW, please!’ “ If I had looked back I probably would have seen their mouths hanging open.

I came home feeling sorry for myself. I hate that feeling. I don’t like being the kind of person who feels sorry for themselves. I felt like I didn’t belong anywhere. The Deaf world doesn’t identify with me and seems to feel threatened by my bionics. The hearing world assumes I cannot communicate with them. I was mad. (I’m big enough to admit that)

However, this morning I had an email from a friend in L.A., who relayed something that happened to her over the weekend. It reminded me that I don’t live these ‘frustrations’ alone.

I had another email from a list serve to which I belong called, “HOH-LD News”. It is a mail list/newsletter email that goes about about once a week targeted specifically to hard-of-hearing, late-deafened individuals. Larry Sivertson and his wife are two individuals who are making things happen on the west coast and “beyond”. This list serve is only one of many things they do. They are an encouragement to me.

These kinds of things are an affirmation to me in many ways. I am NOT alone. It is an unfortunate reality that there are over 34 million Americans with hearing loss in the U.S. It is a fortunate reality that there are some who “reach out” in support, education, and advocacy. Without them I would feel alone.

It’s a new week.

Denise Portis
©2007 Hearing Loss Diary

L’Eggo my Eggo

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Did you know that the Eggo waffle has been around since the 1960’s? My two teenagers would consider that pretty “scary sick” or “wicked” that I actually know that little tidbit. (Isn’t it great that when you’ve homeschooled for nine years, your kids are immune to the current fashionable “lingo” that teenagers use?) In reality, it’s only because I’ve been around since the mid-60’s.

I love the commercials and they’ve changed very little over the years. (Even though I found a really cool website that allows the little ones to play waffle games. Where were these things when we were kids? Click here to check it out.)

It may be great fun to hang over the toaster and see who can scream “L’eggo My Eggo“! However, my teens had a conversation not to long ago about how it really teaches, “You who weigheth more can knock a sibling on their caboose, to attain yonder steaming waffle”. I’d like to think as a homeschool mom that my kids would choose to discuss something that gave evidence that homeschooling really pays off… like who invented the toaster? … or, just what ARE the ingredients in an Eggo waffle? (Don’t look… You’ll be scared spitless!) But discussing the fact that treating each other with respect is NOT exactly what is taught through Eggos and sticky syrup is “ok” by me too. When you have two teenagers, you take the “teachable moments” as they come.

You’d think since we homeschool that it would be very easy for me to teach my now sixteen and seventeen year old children to “play nice”, and “look to the needs” of others… “to offer up a fresh, hot Eggo to a half-asleep sister”. But we are bombarded from numerous “it’s mine” type of sources. Movies, television, video games, the internet, youth groups, family reunions… and the breakfast table, all can negatively influence how we view the ownership of an “incoming waffle”.

Something we do is try to be “sneaky nice”. We try to be unselfish in ways that are not readily apparent. Leaving a note on the plate with one remaining cookie that says, “Here kid brother, I have unselfishly left this one remaining cookie for YOU, in order that you will live long and prosper”, doesn’t count. It has to be something that only you and God know. We’ve had a great time trying to “guess” who has blessed us “unaware”. Just a few “anti-Eggo” character building ideas –
1. Bring in the mail without being asked
2. Lug your sister’s heavy backback from the top of the stairs where SHE left it after co-op classes, to her desk for her.
3. Get out a cereal bowl for the other person without being asked. They are asleep on their place mat anyway.
4. STICK AN EGGO IN THE TOASTER as you leave the kitchen and let another’s nose lead them to the “squares of gold”

I think if we all actually tried hard enough, we could all come up with “anti-Eggo” random acts of kindness.

DeniseP
©2007 Hearing Loss Diary

Spiders!

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This weekend my daughter discovered something rather horrible. As I am a “recovering Arachnophobe” please know that I did indeed think her discovery was THAT… horrible! It seems her bedroom had a mommy spider and a daddy spider pro-create and produce numerous offspring. They were fruitful and multipied…

Now I have a reason for having arachnophobia. In southeastern Colorado where I grew up, we did have tarantulas. In some of the canyons in Baca County, there are certain times of the year where the tarantulas would “migrate” across roads, etc. to find mates. I’ve only seen a couple of the migrations, but I believe it is what “messed me up” as my kids would say. These migrations still go on today… as this link clearly shows. I am “recovering” in that I do not jump out of moving vehicles anymore upon the discovery of a spider on the inside of my car (like I did when I was 7 months pregnant with my daughter… thank goodness for my husband’s quick hands!) Yes… I believe there has been real growth in this area!

Kyersten came to me with fear and trembling about the fact that she had killed a couple of large spiders similar to the picture above, and “lots of babies”. We discussed it in great horrid detail. I felt the hair on my arms stand straight up! Pesticides were out… we have too many pets, and Chloe (my hearing assistance dog). So she has determined to kill as many as she can each day in hopes of wiping out the colony. (Do spiders have colonies?) We hung up tacky fly paper in the corners in hopes of snaring some of them. We went to war she and I. She doesn’t really have arachnophobia like I do, but she does have a fear of tiny crawling things. (Ants are her main paranoia if you must know!) However, little spiders fit right into that category, so she spent some sleepless nights. It didn’t matter that the babies were so teeny-tiny, that they couldn’t bite her. It didn’t matter that spiders do not crawl into your bed with the primary purpose of biting you. None of this matters at all when you discover numerous uninvited guests. She and I have been a little jumpy lately.

Now I am “recovered” enough from my phobia of spiders, that I actually felt compelled to explain how unreasonable she was being as she attempted to stay awake at breakfast over her pop-tart. (Don’t get me started on how Kyersten never eats a nutritious breakfast!) Isn’t it funny how we can “preach” at somebody when we aren’t walking in their shoes? It was very easy for me to do… I didn’t have spiders in my bedroom. (And I refused to sit around thinking about how easy it would be for them to migrate upstairs). I should have been a little more compassionate.

I have thought very poorly of people in the past who try to tell me how I should work to communicate with a hearing loss when they have normal hearing. It never goes over well at HLAA chapter meetings for a person with normal hearing to speak on what those with hearing loss should do to communicate more effectively. They should not be speaking on something they don’t live… they don’t have spiders in THEIR bedroom. And yet, I have learned so much by listening to what the hearing people in my life have said to me. Things that they themselves struggle with in communicating with me. I may think that I shouldn’t have to tell someone to face me when they are talking to me. However, they can’t understand why one time I may hear them fine from the other room, and then another time I will not. THEY are suppose to know when I’m tired and not hearing as well? THEY are suppose to know there is enough background noise going on that I cannot hear them as well and need to see them? That is more than being a little unreasonable on my part!

Do you know something else I’m guilty of? Sometimes when I just went through a communication FLOP… a situation where everything that could go wrong in listening… DID… I ask for opinions and then don’t want to listen. But if I ask for an opinion of someone who does not have a hearing loss… I need to learn to listen. I can at times, whine about the problem and discuss it to death… not really ever choosing a way to handle it better the next time. Instead I choose to only look at the problem and feel sorry for myself. Everywhere I look, there are spiders.

Kyersten’s big brown eyes were wide with terror about the spiders all over her bedroom… and she asked for my opinion. We discussed it at great length… I came up with several options and she choose a course of action. She listened. She chose.

I have whined so many times about a “poor hearing” situation and asked for opinions and options. I need to be willing to listen, discuss and choose a plan of attack. I want to grow. How about you?

Denise Portis
©2007 Hearing Loss Diary

My Kid Figured Out I Can’t Hear

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As I was updating my hearing loss diary, I cried all over again when I came across this one. (see below) I just wondered how many other mothers there are out there who find a special type of frustration in what they are NOT hearing in their kiddo’s lives. I have a good friend who is completely deaf (culturally deaf) and she continues to tell me how blessed I am that I could still hear reasonably well when my kids were babies. I know she’s right, and yet I wonder how many conversations my children choose not to have because having a conversation with “mom” is so time consuming. They’re pre-teen and “teen”. I want to have conversations with my kids. I’m rambling, I know! Grin! I think I can see how being hearing impaired can make you lonely in your own house full of people. Can anyone relate? Anyway…

May 8, 2003
This morning around 2:25 a.m., my son Christopher woke me up by scaring me to death actually. He grabbed my arm and shook me! There was a time NO ONE could sneak up on me even when I was asleep! I said sweetly, ok…. I growled, “What do ya WANT!!???”, loud enough to wake my sleeping husband as well.

OK… I exaggerate again… it didn’t wake him but he did groan and turn over! My son, continued to grab at my arm. Now he’s 12 years old, and weighs almost as much as I do. When he’s grabbing at my arm, I feel like slappin’ him up side of the head! (At least I do when I’ve just been woke up from a sound sleep!) Finally, I realized something was up. (Proof positive hearing impairment does not mean one is mentally impaired as well)

I followed him out in the hallway and he turned to face me…. still clutching at my arm. I almost died of shock. (Well, perhaps death was still a long way off, but my heart did skip a beat!) His face was white and his lips blue. Asthma. He’d never had anattack before, but I’d seen this enemy in my own mirror. I knew just what to do. Steam, doctor call (which husband fully roused took careof….. afterall, I did more than CLUTCH his arm. More like used him like a trampoline!) and calm.

Ever try to be calm when your youngest isn’t breathing well? While we were waiting for instructions from the doctor, he managed to rasp out, “Mom… I’ve been calling you for a long time! I yelled until I couldn’t yell anymore!” I almost died of shock. Did I already say that? Ever feel your heart pound and race out of fear? That’s how I felt in that moment. I’d let my kid down. I wasn’t there for him when he needed me…. wait a minute. My husband can hear! Where was he at? I’m gonna KILL HIM! smile. But I didn’t. Some people sleep very soundly, he’s one of ’em!

Well… my son knows I can’t hear. What’s with that? I’m thinkin’ in his child-clouded panic, he wasn’t thinking that mom cannot hear when her ear is turned off. (the way the kids describe my hearing aid).

Next… the early morning trip to the doctor. I slap on my magnetic badge, “Please face me. I read lips”. No one faces me. I am now sleepy, scared and angry. All in that order. The doctor puts my son on a nebulizer giving instructions the entire time. Ok. I can hear now. At least I can hear the rumble and bubbles of this machine helping my son breathe better. The doctor’s voice is still lost somewhere. I’m guessing it’s behind that worn out painting that she’s facing instead of facing ME!

Finally, I stand up for myself. Stand up for my kid. Stand up for patients who can’t hear. At least I did in that one instant. Our doctor looks embarassed. That’s something I guess. So home again and time for a “mommy sermon”.”Ok. You are both 12 and 13 years old. You know I can’t hear. You know I especially cannot hear when I’m in bed, without the HA, without my eyes open. You have a responsibility to come to me. Your old enough for responsibilities. You must help me help you.”

It went on for another 20 minutes or so. But I stepped off my soapbox still shaking. Still devastated. Still in shock. I can’thear.

Denise P.
©2006 Hearing Loss Diary

Christmas Letter 2005

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2005 Christmas Letter
Saturday, December 10, 2005
2:41 PM

When I look back over the last year the word that I think about is opportunities.” I hear some people complain that one day is just like the next. They just try to make it through to the next vacation, or even retirement down the road. I am thankful that God has given me a life where each day is unique; each week is filled with so many opportunities.
The quality of life our family enjoys in Maryland is so wonderful. Growing
up in the South, I never thought too much about Maryland. Our small suburb of Washington is just large enough to have a nice library, shopping and restaurants without feeling too crowded.

Besides being able to go into Washington, we also have been able to get to know West Virginia and Pennsylvania. In West Virginia we have grown fond of Harper’s Ferry, and in Pennsylvania we have come to love Hershey and the beautiful areas around Amish country in Lancaster County.

As executive director of the Hearing Loss Association of America, I have many opportunities to get to know people from all over the country. Whether I have been in Los Angeles or Philadelphia this year, I have been able to meet new friends.

Denise’s new hearing through her cochlear implant has been a miracle in 2005. Of course she will never have normal hearing again, but this technology allows her to hear voices and things we take for granted like water running or wind chimes.

I finally got the entire family to join me at Frederick Athletic Club. We are all members now and enjoy basketball, weights, and the many exercise machines. Now that I have turned 40 it is important for me not to let atrophy set in too quickly!

I have also enjoyed the opportunity to teach a psychology class for Chieftain Institute again this year. The students have shown so much interest and been a pleasure to teach.

I hope everyone who reads this has a Merry Christmas and a Happy New year!

Terry

It’s that time of year again! Time to nag the family to participate in the Christmas letter that we send out! Actually, I rarely have to twist arms. Everyone in our family seems to enjoy writing.

I’m teaching three classes this year at Chieftain Institute. It’s amazing how much more work three classes is than two. However, I love teaching and it keeps me busy in a good way. I also continue to homeschool our kids, and they continue to excel in their studies and tests each year. Chieftain Institute has been a blessing, as the kids can take foreign language classes there, as well as other classes that I am not as comfortable attempting to teach. This also gives them the opportunity to be under other wonderful teachers, and also to be with other students in a classroom setting. We do school from 7:00 AM until about 4:30 or 5:00 PM each day. That may seem like a long day, but our kids don’t have homework. Smile! They are involved in a great number of community projects and volunteer a great deal as well.

We still have a great number of pets. I am not as keenly aware of it as I use to be since I do not take care of any of them except for my dog, Max. The kid’s are very self-sufficient when it comes to taking care of their “critters”, and even pay for their food, vet bills, etc., or do extra chores to earn towards this extra expense. The kids still foster “pocket pets” for Small Angels, a non-profit in Frederick that helps to find homes for unwanted guinea pigs, hamsters, gerbils, rats, chinchillas, etc. For some reason, our family has become one of the “rat expert” families. This is not necessarily a title I’m really keen about, but the kids really enjoy it. We also started 4-H this year so they are working in all this extra care for their pets in this program as well.

I was implanted with a cochlear implant on April 6th of this year, and was activated on May 13th. We video taped everything from the point of us leaving for the hospital, all the way up through the activation. Even though it was ME, I still get goose bumps watching it, and cannot really get over the miracle of not hearing one moment, and hearing so well the next. The family really teases me good naturedly about the stunned look on my face on the video when I am switched “on” in my doctor’s office. I “heard” seconds before she actually said, “Denise, can you hear me?” Who would have thought air conditioners, doors slamming in the distance, footsteps outside in the hall, my son wiggling in his chair, etc., could all make this incredible combination of sound! I journal a great deal, and write about all the different things I am hearing. Hearing, is certainly not something I take for granted. My hearing is not perfect, but I am hearing so much more than I ever thought that I would. To say this year has been an unforgettable one, is an understatement.

Terry continues to work as Executive Director of the Hearing Loss Association (the name changed in November of this year). He is gone for 12 hours a day (part of that commute time), but he comes home a happy kind of tired. He expends a great deal of energy in his job, but it’s because he loves people with hearing loss. When he is home he’s a great dad, and attentive husband, but when he’s at work he certainly works tirelessly towards making a difference. We have had a few opportunities to speak at some meetings together this year, and I have certainly enjoyed traveling with him. I’m a bit amazed at the different opportunities my deafness has afforded me to speak to others about hearing loss. I was very blessed to be able to speak at the Congressional Hearing Health Caucus in July. The Congressional staffers also asked to see part of my activation video, and I was surprised to see tears on many faces. My hearing loss has become such a part of me, that I had forgotten those with normal hearing are stunned by evidence of the miracle of “hearing again”, and what hearing means to an individual. I also love speaking at local chapters of the Hearing Loss Association, and have met so many wonderful people.

My dad had a heart attack on October 13th of this year. He actually died at the activity center of the retirement community my parents live at in Florida. A retired EMT and some retired nurses brought him back with a defibulator that the center had just purchased. He had 4-way bi-pass surgery on October 17th. I was able to go and spend a couple of weeks at my parents to help out and also get in the way. I was so glad to be able to go. Dad is doing great now, and mom is breathing more normally now that the immediate danger is past. He is certainly a walking miracle. I was able to see my two brothers for a few days while they were there for my dad’s surgery. I haven’t seen them in awhile, so that was a big thrill for me.

I have continued corresponding and posting online in different hearing loss forums. It’s amazing what the internet has done for those with hearing loss, by providing a community through email and message boards. It’s so nice to be able to talk to others who have experienced hearing loss. I have “met” so many wonderful people and have been encouraged by so many individuals. I also have been able to correspond with others who are new to hearing loss. Statistics show that the number of Americans with hearing loss will surge in the next decade. I expect the internet to continue being the place many go to find help. If you have internet access, you will have to check out http://www.hearingloss.org (the Hearing Loss Association’s website).

Our own family has a website as well. We try to keep it updated. http://www.lightkeepers.net

This Christmas has certainly been exciting, as I’m hearing things I haven’t in over a decade. The meaning of Christmas hasn’t changed at all though! I am forever grateful for Christ’s birth, and I certainly try to remember that HE is the reason for this season. May God bless you and yours,
Denise

Merry Christmas everyone! This is Kyersten and my mom asked me to include a part in the Christmas letter. Being the procrastinator that I am, I waited until the day of mom’s “deadline” to do it. I am, unfortunately, quite a procrastinator, which gets me into trouble sometimes. I even have a shirt that says, “I’ll stop procrastinating – tomorrow” or something like that. Ha, not only am I a procrastinator, I am also random. I’m pretty sure mom didn’t want me to spend the whole time talking about procrastinating.

The most exciting news of this year is that my mom received a cochlear implant! We were all so excited. She went to John’s Hopkins for the surgery. She is hearing a lot better now! And the really cool thing is that you can stick magnetic stuff to her head, but you are not supposed to.

This year in school, I am in 10th grade. I’ll hopefully be starting Driver’s Ed soon! I am taking three classes at Chieftain this year: Sign Language 3 (taught by my mom), Spanish 2 (taught by Mrs. Richardson), and Psychology (taught by my dad). It is funny to have two of my parents as my teachers because their teaching styles are so different. My favorite subject in school this year other than my Chieftain classes is probably Total Language Plus. You read a book and from that book you get spelling and vocabulary words and stuff. My least favorite is still math. This year I am doing Algebra 2.

This summer the SHHH convention (by the way, Self Help for the Hard of Hearing has recently been changed to the Hearing Loss Association) was in Washington D.C. We didn’t have very far to travel! It was a very nice hotel and we had fun.

Our family still has a lot of pets. Just by myself, I own one dog, two cats, three rats, and one fish. My dog, Ebony, is still alive (much to our vet’s astonishment) and very happy. My two cats, Mandie and Kiki, are as fat and quirky as ever. My three rats are Mercy (a very old, very fat rat), Zoe (a young curious rat), and Milky Way (a very mean rat, but I love him anyway!) My fish is a Black Fantail Goldfish and loves to eat.

We have had a very nice year and I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and New Year! I would love to hear from all of you all year ‘round! Email me at sign4godteen@lightkeepers.net.
Sincerely,
Kyersten

Hey Guys! Mom wanted me to tell you about my “interesting” year. Right now, I am going to something called Chieftain Institute. Chieftain Institute is a place where homeschoolers can go to earn high school credit by taking classes taught by professionals on a certain subject. In CI, I am taking Debate Club, Debate Class, and Sign Language 1. Sign Language 1 is taught by Denise Portis (I think she is the BEST teacher) and we learn about how to communicate to deaf and hard of hearing people by making certain gestures with our hands. (That’s why it’s called “Sign” Language) In this class we learn three different songs, make a five-minute presentation in front of the whole class (I need to start working on it), and the whole class has to chose one of the songs to sign in front of everybody at CI at the end of the year. Debate Class is taught by Mrs. Smith, and is where beginning debaters learn how to, well… debate. Debate Club is where we have practice rounds, help each other with their cases, and go to tournaments. So far I have lost one round and won one round. The one round I lost I was trying to prove that health courts would fix the system, and the one round I won I was trying to disprove that health courts would fix the system. (Ironic huh?)

Well, Jr. High Youth group is pretty much the same. Jr. High Youth Group is a program on Sunday night where we play a messy game, have someone give their testimony, and have a lesson from our devotions in the past week. Jr. High gives out a magazine every month called “Youth Walk” that has daily devotionals we are suppose to do each day. Then, the lesson in the following week is on the devotionals that we just did. The messy game usually involves pickles, onions, chocolate dipped pretzels, or something else like that, but just recently we didn’t have a “messy game.” (Apparently, Mr. Cook, our game leader, is starting to run low on ideas.) We all got in a big circle and played “monkey in the middle,” or, as I call it, EXTREME monkey in the middle. Our most athletic person (I prefer not to call him by name because this letter is probably going to Matthew Reeping) tends to stay in the middle the longest. (Another ironic thing!) Also, I would like to mention my youth group leaders who made this all possible. Mrs. Guy, Mr. Neff, Mr. Cook, Ms. Becky, and Mrs. Sphere. There was someone else I was supposed to mention that I forgot last year but I can’t think of his name. I know he gave me a hard time about it. I know he is the one who tells really bad jokes but I still can’t think of his name. I guess I will have to move on.

Also this year in youth group, we went on a weekend retreat. The subject was called “Maximum Exposure” and we were taught with three different lessons, “choose your lighting, choose your focus, and change your filter.” Each of these lessons had to do with a camera and taught us how to do different things in our daily lives. Other than that, it was a pretty crazy weekend. From the bathroom toilets being clogged (which everyone thought was me) and a teddy bear being held ransom. (Which everyone thought was me again. I really had nothing to do with these things!)
Recently, my Mom got a cochlear implant. I won’t go into detail since my Mom will probably go into the little “technical” details in her part of the letter. A cochlear implant is a device that lets my mom hear better than she ever would have with a hearing aid and was a big thing for my Mom to have the privilege to get. Her doctor at Johns Hopkins was one of the best doctors she could have gotten for the surgery. Anyway, it is great, and kind of funny, about the new things my Mom can hear. (And maybe doesn’t want to hear)

Well, that is my part of the letter so have a Merry Christmas!
Chris

Self-Check out Lines

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“Self” Check-Out Lines

I recently went into my favorite grocery store with children in tow. Now I use the term “children” carefully, because in all actuality they are teenagers, which does indeed make a world of difference! Teenagers strive to avoid embarrassment at all costs, are horribly opinionated and as a general rule… hate to go grocery shopping.

I go into the store with a list of a few things I forgot from the PREVIOUS grocery shopping excursion, and leave with a cart full of “Mom I gotta have this”. We proceed to the checkout line and the kid’s eyes widen with surprise and wonder. There – in the middle of the checkout lines are 3 registers that have large illuminated signs that say, “Self Check Out”.

“Mom! Scoot your cart over here! Let’s check out right here… I mean, how cool is THIS?”

Now… I have previously and very dubiously watched people in these check out lines before. They enter very calm, cool and collected. They exit with hair standing on end, their groceries tossed haphazardly into the cart and intentionally run over a nearby Customer Service Manager with their carts as they leave the store. I’ve seen “hearing” people lean into the computer monitor with their eyes squinted, their ears pressed against the little speaker and strain with every fiber of their “hearing” self to understand what to do next! Needless to say, entering the “Self Check Out” line was something I had never thought twice about. I do, after all, have a little sense!

“Ummmm… I don’t think so kids. I’ll never be able to hear what the dumb ol’ computer is sayin’, and I will hold up the lines just because I can’t make sense of what to do! Scoot on over to the next register with a person behind it. I can at least read their lips, and point to my little magnetic badge. (The one that says, “Please face me. I read lips”).

“Mom! Live a little!” (What? Like I’ve been dead or somethin’?) “Besides we can hear what it’s sayin’ and we’ll help ya out!”

Now I should have heeded that little niggling feeling of doubt that rose in my chest, but I filled my lungs with air and boldly swung the cart over to the “Self Check Out” line to “live a little”.

I start to unload the groceries onto the conveyor belt. The belt begins to move, but then it stops and MOVES BACKWARD bringing the groceries I had placed thereon back to me! I turn to my kids with a giant question mark. You know what I mean! Your eyebrows are raised and you tuck your hair behind your ear while unobtrusively turning your hearing aid up with one deft little practiced move. (Like turning your hearing aid up will help you figure out why the conveyor belt isn’t cooperating!)

“Ummm… what’s up? Why isn’t this working?” (Meaning: My blood pressure has just gone up 20 points and if ya don’t help get me outta this mess y’all got me into, I’m gonna KILL YOU!)

The kids are motioning me back and tell me to read the screen…. “Please scan Giant Eagle Preferred Customer Card”. (Oh. Ok. I don’t load up the conveyor belt first. I read the screen first. Got it! How hard can this be?)

I scan my card and the screen immediately changes … It says “Thank you. Giant Eagle Preferred Customer Card accepted!”

“Hey Mom! It said, “Thank you. Giant Eagle Prefer…”

“Yes, son. I can read. Thanks though”.

“Ya, but it has this computer voice like on Star Trek, and it…”

“Yes, son. Whatever. Let’s get thru this, hmmmm?”

Now the screen reads, “Begin scanning items”. I stand there a little blankly, while my kids begin taking a few items out of the cart and search for the bar code.

“Cool! Mom! Look at this! Watch, watch!” So I watch as they deftly scan the bar code on a few items, which is immediately priced and added to a “receipt” that is pictured on the left side of the screen. They place a few items on the conveyor belt and off the items go – in the right direction —- away from us.

(Hey! I can do this!) I get out the large water container under the cart, figuring I’ll save the kids from hefting it up on the scanner. (‘course, where I grew up we had “well” water that brought our water from over a 100 feet below the surface, sparkling clear and COLD into our house. Now that I’m livin’ in DC, you DON’T DRINK THE WATER. You gotta buy it! But that’s another story…)

I scan the water container and put it on the conveyor belt. The computer receipt changes and adds on the cost of the water. But immediately something goes wrong. The computer screen empties and flashes a giant red “X” across the screen that blinks, and blinks, and blinks. I do what any normal “in-over-her-head” mother would do. I point my finger at it and shout, “Stop!”

My daughter touches my elbow and says, “Mom it said to take the water to the end of the conveyor belt to the bagging section.” Sure enough the water I placed on the conveyor belt has stopped —- NOT moving in the right direction away from me.

“Well what’s the problem? It rang up right!”

“Well first of all,” she says with a slight exaggerated squeeze to my elbow, “you are s-h-o-u-t-i-n-g.” (She carefully enunciates this so that I am sure to understand the gravity of the situation. After all, you do not shout while in the company of your teenagers and bring attention to yourself!)

“It’s probably too heavy. Let’s just follow the directions and take it to the end.”

“What directions? “ I say, as I stab my finger towards the giant blinking red “X”.

But she has turned and picked the water up off the conveyor belt. The computer screen immediately changes to a picture of our receipt on the left, (this is good – almost normal), and a picture of a brown paper bag with a small flashing red “x” across the bag. Now I know this means something is still wrong. I am now a full inch taller —- you know the kind of growth that takes place when tension seeps up your spine and causes height to be added to your stature? THAT kind of growth.

My son says, “Mom it says to return items to the conveyor belt!”

“But it just told us to remove it and take it to the baggage area!” I am trying to deliberately and intentionally lower my voice, without much success. As a matter of fact I think I squeaked at this point.

My daughter has reached the baggage area and placed the water on the rubber mat at the end. Instantaneously, the computer screen again changes and now it appears as if all is normal. I turn to my son with a triumphant grin. He has his nose buried behind a magazine with feigned interest. Like he’s ever been a loyal “Good Housekeeping” reader…

So now with one problem solved and only a few people in line behind me waiting, I continue scanning my items with confidence. Ah! Produce. There obviously isn’t a bar code, but I’ve seen this done innumerable times. The little scan plate is also a scale. I put down the apples. The computer screen changes to a picture of the produce department.

There are 3 buttons. One says, “Produce”, one says “Deli”, and the other says “Organic”. I press “produce” which immediately changes the screen to another. It let’s me choose from vegetables, fruit, etc. (Hey! This is getting easier!) My daughter has taken a single but GIANT step away from me. My son has changed locations and is now about 40 feet away pretending interest in the signs by the “do-it-yourself” carpet cleaning machines.

I quickly scan the last item. The screen changes and it shows a cartoon hand putting a slip of paper into a slot by the register. Hmmm… I stand there stumped for a minute.
“Mom. It says to scan coupons now.” My daughter has returned to my side more to hurry me along than anything else as there are now 5 people in line behind me.

“Well I don’t have any coupons.” My daughter reaches across me and mashes the button that says, “FINISH and pay”. I give her a sheepish grin and turn to tell her thanks, but she has resumed her position of one GIANT step away from mom.

The screen has several buttons that obviously indicate how you would like to choose to pay for your groceries. I mash on “Debit” and the screen changes to a keypad. I cannot hear if any instructions are given….. there certainly aren’t any conveniently typed out for me on the screen. I ASSUME, that it wants me to enter my PIN number. I key in my number. Nothing. NOTHING. I key it in again a little harder. Nothing.

Ok. I hate to do it. I can’t stand doing this. I’m a little tense. Turning to my daughter, I sign, (pointing to computer) “wrong?” She refuses to take a GIANT step towards me to explain, and simply points towards my left. I turn and there, next to the computer screen, is a familiar back box with touch-keys and a place to swipe your card. I dig my card out of my pocket book and swipe it across the “swipe-er”. The computer screen flashes the same keypad I have been looking at, along with now…. 14 pairs of eyes staring at me. I again punch in my PIN number. When I say, “punch” in, I do mean that! At this point I PUNCH in my PIN number with exaggerated stabs of my index finger. Nothing. I again do what any normal mother has learned to do in situations like this. I point my finger at the computer and shout, “STOP!” The computer responds by adding a button to the bottom of the screen as if it has “heard” and “understood” my command. The button reads, “Ask For Customer Assistance”. I mash the button. A red light begins blinking at the top of the pole above my computer register. For some reason there is now NO ONE in line behind me.

A front-end manager quickly walks down the front and towards my register. My children have disappeared.

A young lady reaches my side and says, “Hello! May I help you?”

I point to my badge and say, “Hey. I’m hard of hearing and I’m afraid I missed something. I’m trying to key in my PIN number and the computer won’t accept it.”

She reads my little badge, and faces me and carefully enunciates, “Shhhhh…owww, mmmmeeeeee whhhhattttt youuuuu diddddddd” (Doncha hate it when they do that?) I turn and deftly punch in my PIN number again on the computer screen.

She hides a smile and points to my left. “Ma-am. Punnnch in yooouurr PINNNN nummmbeerr righttt heeerrreee.”

Oh. So the computer screen keypad has nothing to do with my PIN number? Well why doesn’t it SAY so. Or…maybe it did. With head held high, I punch in my PIN number on the BLACK box and then push my way to the cart in which my kids have kindly loaded all my bags. Although… they HAVE been haphazardly thrown in! I’m astonished to note my cart looks like all those carts belonging to the crazed customers who have left this same line before me. Success! It matters not that I am hearing impaired! I’m as normal as anyone else!

©2006 Hearing Loss Diary

Christmas Letter 2003

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Denise:

Hello!

Well, it’s hard to believe we’ve lived in Maryland for a year now! This year has gone so quickly! I still can’t believe the “speed” in which we left North Carolina! In October of 2002, Terry was interviewing for his job here in DC, in November he had accepted and moved up here, and in December we were living as a family just north of DC, in Frederick, Maryland! It took me MONTHS to get over feeling like we’d left in a rush! I still feel strange! I think in part, due to because we left the church in Greensboro in such a rush, and without Terry as he was already in DC. I, for one, really needed that closure I guess. But that’s all behind us, and we’ve adjusted well!

Terry is the Executive Director for the national organization of SHHH, and really loves his job. He also completed his doctorate this last year, so he’s been very busy and has had more “change” than the rest of us! He rides the MARC train each day (Maryland Area Railroad Corporation) to the subway station in Rockville. He then takes the subway into Bethesda to the office. He loves the commute because he can relax and do his devotions on the train in the morning, and then works on email, and “work” on the way home each evening. I’m “at ease” at home since I don’t have to worry about him driving on the roads! It’s much cheaper to commute this way also! It does make for a very long day for him, however. He gets up around 5:30 and heads to the gym for about 30 minutes. He catches the train around 6:30 and gets to work around 8:00. He leaves work around 5:00 and gets home around 7:00 p.m. So Monday-Friday he is really tired, but the kids pitch in more than ever before, so he just comes home and relaxes for the most part during the week. When we have things at church or through our homeschool group during the week, he meets us at church as it is only about 1 block from another subway stop…….”Shady Grove”. So that is a real blessing!

I am teaching the kids at home still. This is our 6th year. I can’t believe how it gets better and better each year! Educating the kids at home has really been a plus in every aspect. The kids not only get a great education, but we are able to pursue a great deal of their “interests”, that we normally would not be able to do if we were a two income, public school family. It really “works” for us! Kyersten is in 8th grade this year, and Chris is in 6th. Kyersten is 13 and will be 14 in February. Chris will be 13 in January. Two teenagers! Pray for me?

I am also teaching in the high school program called “Chieftain Institute”. I have 16 students and am really enjoying teaching American Sign Language. The students are wonderful and really want to learn. They ask great questions! I’m am very excited about my class, and hope I transfer some of that enthusiasm to my students. As my hearing has deteriorated during the past few years, I enjoy discussing real-life problems hearing impaired people face also. I pray that God will allow me to teach for many years to come.

Kyersten really enjoys the Jr. High ministry at our church and has made some wonderful friends. Her youth leaders are all WONDERFUL, and we are very thankful for their influence in her life. She has also been interpreting all the music for our deaf ministry in our church. She has come a long way in this, and I hope God will continue to use her in this way. She also fosters for the animal shelter in Frederick County. She knows a great deal of information about small critters. She’s practically an expert!

Chris is in his last year of AWANA, and is looking forward to earning his “Timothy” award this year. He really enjoys AWANA, and most “group” things. He is the most outgoing one in our family and just enjoys being with people. He has had some wonderful opportunities to really live his faith since we’ve moved here. Most of the neighborhood children are his age, and are boys. I don’t believe any of them are saved. We try to “live” Jesus every day, and Chris has had many opportunities to witness on the basketball court, the park, and our cul-de-sac. We are praying God will use his testimony and his life to win some of these boys to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.

We still have our Akita-mix dog, Max. He turned 9-yrs.-old this year. He’s completely “retired” now from any “help” in helping me hear. However, he still alerts me to the door. We’ve have several wonderful gadgets around the house to help me hear better now, and I think he knows it! He doesn’t even budge when the phone rings now! I have a special ringer alert, and a couple of different phones that are either amplified or have captions, or both. However, I still hate the phone! Grin. It’s very intimidating! However, when I can’t handle something via email, at least I can indeed use the phone now!

We also have 3 cats! Kyersten had “Mandie” when we lived in NC, but she adopted another one when we moved here. “Kiki”, is a British short-hair and is gray and white. “Mandie” is a long-haired orange and white HUGE cat. Chris also adopted a kitten as an early Christmas gift. “Sonya” is a gray calico. They are all females and all……….. “stuck-up”! But they each have their own individual personalities, and are fun to have around the house. Kyersten also has 1 mouse, and 5 rats of her own, plus “whomever” she may be fostering at the time! Right now she has 2 dwarf hamsters, and 1 Syrian hamster.

I still enjoy crocheting, and I love being a stay at home mom. I love housework, chores, yard work and doing the bills. Smile! So I enjoy the work God has called me to do! I guess that’s a good thing!

My parents moved to Florida after my dad retired in August, and my mom in June. They seem very happy. We haven’t been to see them yet, but they’ve come to visit twice here. It will be strange going to visit them, as it isn’t going “home” to Colorado anymore. I noticed this morning that the weather “there” was 72 degrees for the high, and it is 36 degrees for the high here, and we’ve 4 inches of snow on the ground! I can’t wait to see their new home, and they are very happy. They are very BUSY retired people though! They do a little bit of everything!

My two brothers still live in North Carolina. Lee and Michelle have two kids, Seth and Krista. My youngest brother, Doug also lives in North Carolina. My sister lives in San Antonio with her husband and baby boy, Ethan. I haven’t been able to “see” Ethan yet, and it grieves me that I live so far from Diane. Now that we are older, I am really missing my sister.

Terry found our new church on the Internet! He found it before the rest of us even moved up here, too! We simply love it! Derwood Bible Church is in Gaithersburg, Maryland. DBC is an answer to prayer……… we may have had to leave NC quickly, but as soon as it was apparent we were moving, a church home was the #1 priority on our prayer list. God answered that prayer with DBC. We have a wonderful homeschool group also. We are blessed!

I recently had my hearing evaluated again and had a number of tests run as the doctors were concerned as I’ve lost so much of my hearing in the last 3 years. Every test turned out “normal”, so the fear of having an acoustic neuroma is at least been put to rest now. I am profoundly deaf in my left ear, and have a severe loss in the right ear. I was told by my otolaryngologist and my audiologist, that I have amazing speech reading skills. I find that amusing I guess, as it isn’t something I’ve “learned”, but rather picked up through the years without my knowing I was even doing it! I have some frustrating moments when trying to communicate sometimes, but over all I believe I have adapted very well. The whole family has made some adjustments. Unfortunately, it affects everyone, but I am loved……. and no one complains! I have too much to be thankful for, and don’t like to sit around belly-achin’ for what I don’t have! The “good news” of the recent tests I had, showed that the audio-nerve on BOTH sides is intact, so when and if a cochlear implant is needed, I could conceivably have one on either side.

Terry:

We are trying to keep our family website updated so people can look in on us from time to time, www.lightkeepers.net. We have enjoyed living at the foot of the Catoctin Mountains near the Monocacy River. It is very scenic with many great places to shop and eat. We also have been able to visit many places like Gettysburg, the National Aquarium, the National Art Gallery and other places we probably would not have visited had we not moved here.

I have had the opportunity to meet many nice people across the country this year. Even though I had a tornado strand me during one trip, and a blizzard on another one, it has been a great honor to meet so many of the people that support the work of helping people with hearing loss.

With the time I spend on the train each day, I have read more books this year than I have in many years. I have especially enjoyed reading historical books like the ones by Jeff Shaara and David MacCullough.

Judging by how large our cats are now, I would say they are doing fine. They are getting so big that I am starting to be afraid of them, and wonder if we are allowed to have felines this big without some type of permit. Thankfully, I still can sit by the fireplace with our dog and hope the cats leave us alone!

Denise has been busy teaching both our own children and now other peoples’ children as well. She has started a local group for people who are hard of hearing and it looks like it will help a lot of people. With Denise’s continually worsening hearing, email and the Internet has become more important than ever. She is working hard at our church to grow our ministry to deaf and hard of hearing people. When I travel to other parts of the country, people always ask me where Denise is. She has become quite respected in the hard of hearing community and has encouraged lots of people in the last year. I think she does not realize how many people she has helped even in the midst of struggling to adjust to her own severe hearing problems.

Kyersten is very active in fostering animals. I do not really remembering OK’ing this venture, but I am she must have asked while I was watching a football game. She loves her new youth group and leaders. We are very proud of her strong testimony and the way she interprets part of the service at church now for the deaf.

Chris is enjoying making new friends, and has been a strong testimony in the neighborhood among other boys his age. We are thankful that he was able to continue in AWANA’s here in Maryland, even though it is his last year. He has memorized hundreds of Bible verses and we will be proud to see him receive a Timothy Award at the end of the school year. Chris and I tried to be Washington Redskins fans, but they make it really hard. Maybe we will be Baltimore Ravens’ fans and wear purple around in January.

Kyersten:

Hello family and friends! This is Kyersten and mom wanted me to write about myself so that she could put it in her family newsletter.
I am in 8th grade this year and we have been homeschooling for six years. I love homeschooling and hope to do it all the way up to collage. Can you all believe that I will be in high school next year? Makes some of you feel old huh? By far, my least favorite subject is math. This year I am starting algebra and I despise it, but not as much as I despise geometry. Strong word, despise is. But I really do not like it, however, I do love my math teacher and she is the best! Language…it is okay. I don’t adore it but I don’t mind it. But did you know that “ain’t” is not a word? How wrong is that! We should stand outside wherever they make up words with signs and protest! Literature is awesome! I adore books and reading, so I adore that. Science is good as long as it is about animals…other wise, who cares about molecules and that mess!? History is great; it is really interesting to learn about America’s history, especially. Sign language, geography, spelling, and health are some other things we do. For poetry, we memorize a poem and learn a little bit about the author. I like Robert Frost’s “Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening” for this cold, northern weather. On Fridays, we would go to something called Adventure Club for more Literature, P.E., and Wilderness Survival. In Literature, we got to read The Hiding Place. It is a wonderful book about a marvelous woman named Corrie Ten Boom. If you’ve never read it, you should. In P.E. we learned the basics of soccer. I don’t like soccer, but it was good for me to learn the basics. In Wilderness Survival, we learned how to survive in the wilderness, DUH! It was fun, we got to learn how to make fire, shelters, find food, being prepared, etc.
On Sundays I get to interpret the music for my mom. Sign language is fun and it is nice to be able to practice every Sunday even though I am not the best interpreter. But I am getting better every week. Hopefully, someday, I can do more than just the music.
Jr. High, yes for you North Carolina people, we don’t call it middle school here but Jr. High. Anyway, Jr. High at church is awesome. We have the best leaders and have the most fun. Plus we get to learn a lot about God and they really encourage devotions every day. Derwood Bible Church, the whole of it, is wonderful. We were really blessed to find this church.
I have started fostering for the Frederick animal shelter. I love it! So far I have found homes for ten hamsters and two rats. (One rat I adopted myself.) Right now, I have a hamster that is working on her people skills and two dwarf hamsters. (One of them is diabetic) It is nice to be able to save these animals. It is great to see them go to a new home and have a second chance at life.
We have ten animals of our own. (Eleven if you count the fish….) Max is our Akita/Border Collie mix, male dog. He is the absolutely best dog ever! Mom is definitely his human. He adores her. Chris has a kitten named Sonya, who is not very pretty, but the sweetest thing ever. Mandie is my big, orange and white, moody cat. She has some…unusual habits…but I love her. Kiki is my slightly plump (some people call her fat…not so!), gray and white cat. She is the softest cat ever and sweet…when she feels like being sweet. Then I have five precious, sweet, fun rats. (no really…they are wonderful!). I also have a blind, deaf, and old mouse named Moose.
Our new neighborhood is a lot different than our old one. At our old one, there were hardly any kids. At our new one, there are a lot! They all really need Christ and my brother and I are working hard to get it across to them.
Well, merry Christmas everyone and everyone have a great year!

Chris:

Hey family and friends! My mom asked me to be a part of the yearly Christmas letter so I wanted to let you know how my year has gone.

This is my sixth year of homeschooling. On Fridays I go to something called Adventure Club. There with other homeschoolers, I take classes like “Wilderness Survival”, “Literature”, and “P.E.” In “Wilderness Survival” we learned how to make things like fire (of course we did this outside), make a shelter, find food and water, and other survival techniques. In “Literature” we read and discussed The Hiding Place. It is a true story about Corrie Ten Boom, a girl that decided to hide Jews in her house during the World War. However, the Nazis come in and take her and her family away to a concentration camp. Luckily, they did not find the Jews in her house. Throughout the rest of the book Corrie gets through trials and it helps her realize that she can always trust in God. In “P.E.” we are learning soccer. We went over dribbling, passing, shooting, and other soccer stuff.
In school I am learning Math, Language, History, Science, Cursive, Geography, Sign Language, Literature, and Spelling. We are using mostly ABEKA schoolbooks but also Saxon Math. On Sunday night I go to something called AWANA clubs. There with other club members we participate in things like games, memory verses, and council time. In game time we split up into four colors: red, yellow, blue, and green. I am on the blue team. Then we play games like Dodge Ball, Tug of War, and other relay races. Then we go to a different room and say Bible verses we were suppose to study during the week. We say them from a book. There are different books depending on which grade you are in. I am in my last book. When you finish your book you get an award. When I finish my book I will get the last award called the Timothy award. In Council Time our leader tells us a Bible story or lets a missionary talk about what they did. They also give us awards on what section we did in our book. At the end of Council Time they add up the points we made and tell us what color won and they give that color team a prize. Then at the end of AWANA our parents come and pick us up.
We have lived in Maryland a whole year now. It is hard to believe that we have lived here for that long. I have made some friends and practically everyone is named “Kevin”. It makes it easy to remember names the only other friend I have is named “Chris”! I have had a great year in Maryland. I hope you all have a merry Christmas!

Love,
Chris

"Altitudinal" Change

Published on by hearingelmoLeave a comment

10-26-1997
“Altitudinal” Change

You know? I’ve always been told by my family and those that know me well that there are days I have an “attitude”. When I’m told that, I think…”Who are they to say that? They think I’ve got an attitude? Well good GRIEF! They should just go look in the mirror! Who do THEY THINK THEY ARE? WHO ARE THEY TO LABEL ME? (Sigh!) O.K. Maybe they are right. Yea. They’re right. O.K. I can have an attitude. So understand that I was very anxious to have an “attitudinal” change! Borrowing the title of a popular book…if I was going to “Sport a ‘Tude”, then I wanted it to be a good one!

So I set about changing my attitude. I prayed. I discussed it with my husband. (Who…by the way, was a little TO EAGER to discuss it with me!) I was determined to have a positive, thoughtful attitude toward life and life’s challenges. Did it work? Well…let’s just say that I have to pray about it daily. You know kicking a life-long habit is hard! It takes daily prayer and determination! It takes GOD!

I was quite determined that my “attitudinal” change, would not be a “latitudinal” change! I was determined to not change one bad attitude for another one; nor, did I want to be judgmental, harsh, critical, etc. It has been one of the most difficult struggles I have ever dealt with! Why? Well, you know? It is my sin nature that causes me to have a bad attitude. Until I get to Heaven, I am gonna have to constantly be alert to the easy and natural way I can develop a bad attitude! If I’m not alert, I’m in trouble!! After all, the enemy is alert. He prowls around lookin’ to gobble me up! I have to be vigilant!

Now, however, I am praying a little differently. When I see the needs in my church family for teachers, workers, PEOPLE…I’ve decided to pray for an “altitudinal” change. ‘Cause you see, our church is short on workers. Why? (I’ll get back to that later). I figure if I change my “altitude” by getting on my knees and really praying…then those prayers can make a difference. Yes. I know that God knows and sees the areas of need in my church. He knows. God knows everything! But you know? Something special happens to me when I’m on my knees. I may be “bowing down”…letting my requests be made known. But my spirit is lifted high and above all these earthly problems and trials. I have the privilege of being right in God’s presence! Now that’s an altitude change!

God, help me to love these children as if they were my own. Give me the words to say when they are good…and not so good. Give me warm arms and a loving heart in which to embrace them. Give me clean ears to hear clearly what they are trying to say and make understood to me. Give me a ready smile for every child. Help me to laugh with them. Even when I’ve paint in my hair and a run in my stockings. Give me the discipline to find the time each and every week to think of them outside of Sunday School. Give me the time to write a note to each child. Give me the desire to pray for them daily. God, help me love them as You love them. Any less won’t work. If I should get discouraged or lonely for Christian friends my own age, help me to see the opportunity in every fellow teacher. If I feel the need for a Bible study of my peers, remind me of all the opportunities offered each and every day at the wonderful church you’ve put me in. Give me an “altitudinal” change! I pray these things, in Your name…Amen.

So I’m challenging myself. I don’t want to let the enemy ever win by letting myself be discouraged. I refuse to let him allow me to think that “someone else can do it”…”you deserve a break”…”you aren’t cut out for this”. I’m in this for the long haul. There will always be children who need a teacher that loves them. God cannot call anyone to an area of ministry with children lightly. There is nothing more precious to God than a child. How can I think any less. I’m prayin’ for an “altitudinal” change. I’m gonna have to pray for it daily! But down on my knees I can see that I can do it!

Earlier I asked why our church is short on workers. Is it because we don’t have enough trained people? No. Is it because everyone has far to many commitments to their own families? No. Is it because God doesn’t want the children ministered to? Absolutely NOT. Maybe it’s because the Christians are to afraid to leave their “comfort zone”. Maybe it’s because they really don’t realize the need. But just perhaps, it’s because there aren’t enough people lookin’ for an “altitudinal” change.

Denise Portis
©2006 Hearing Loss Diary