working dogs – Page 10

Off Vest

Published on April 25, 2009 by hearingelmo1 Comment

Coffee break for Chloe... or rather tummy rub

One of my students snapped this picture of Chloe off vest while I was on the floor with her one afternoon.

Off Vest

Our work day on Thursday is a long one. Thankfully, I have a whole hour break between classes at 3 PM. When possible, I take Chloe’s vest off and take her for a quick walk. I chase her around the classroom with a squeaky toy, or “mess with her” a bit. It usually ends up with some Chloe lovin’, and we just chill for a bit before the next class starts.

Ever once in awhile I have a student meeting, or parent/teacher conference. When that happens, Chloe waits patiently by my side but I can tell she knows it’s past 3 PM. Have you ever heard a dog sigh? If I’m close enough, I can hear her heave a big sigh that is just a big exaggerated. It cracks me up actually!

Chloe’s “off vest” time at home means our nightly walk. It only takes about 20-25 minutes and I walk REALLY fast. My husband teases me that it’s practically a sprint. We can only go when it’s not rainy out, b/c I don’t walk when the weather is bad… I weave! (grin) During our walks, Chloe knows she is “off vest”. She sniffs around, walks in “heel” if she feels like it, switches to “place” if she wants. I make her sit in heel and wait when we come to a crossroad. Once we cross the street, I let her know she’s free to sniff around again. This is her time to just be a “dog”.

Off Duty

It’s important that we learn to take some time to be “off duty” each day. Likely, you play many different roles each and every day. You may be an employee, or adviser. Perhaps you are a chaueffer for those who don’t make the car payment in the home (grin). Some of us make the appointments, are the personal shopper, take care of the yard, and scoop the poop. Maybe you are the cook and accountant. You may be the housekeeper and laundress. It is very possible you are someone’s cheerleader. Thank goodness pom-poms are optional…

Even if it’s only for 30 minutes or so, don’t do anything “necessary“. Stop and investigate, sniff around a bit if you like. Literally take the time to smell the roses. If you’ve allergies like me, “smelling the roses” may mean sneezing like crazy later. But I find my own way to “rest and reflect”. It may be with a cup of green tea and a good book on proverbs or “famous quotes”. These brief forays away from “your job that defines you” is very important.

Women are the world’s worst about removing their vest. They think they have to be “Super Mom”, or “Super Woman”. They wear so many hats, these defining headpieces lean precariously off the tilt of their weighted down head. We do so many things, we end up not doing any one thing well. Take the time to unwind.

Breathe deeply.

Meditate and/or pray.

Write in a journal.

Burp if you want too.

(Sorry… I had to throw that in b/c Chloe gets such a rub down and vigorous massage when she’s off vest, she burps in contentment)

Denise Portis

Demo at AACC

Published on April 22, 2009April 23, 2009 by hearingelmoLeave a comment

aacc-demo-010

Chloe and I had a great time at AACC today doing a DEMO. I’ll write more about it when I find some time this weekend. Chloe and I comprised the “hearing team” (which is funny actually because I’m deaf… but that’s what they call it), and Joe and Ace (a black lab), Geoff and Theo (a Doberman mix) made up the service teams. We had 3 therapy teams present, all of whom go to Bethesda Naval Hospital as well. Judy and Dazzle (a Sheltie), Susan and Mackie (a standard poodle) and Debbie and Nicholas (a collie), always are popular as the students ARE allowed to pet them.

Wouldn’t you know a young man came through the Student Union where we were and spotted Mackie and recognized him? When he was on base at Bethesda Naval, Mackie came to visit him over a period of time. He had big tears in his eyes, but had a smile a mile wide! Mackie acted like he knew him too!

Whew! I’m tired!

Denise Portis

Meniere’s Help

Published on April 1, 2009April 1, 2009 by hearingelmo5 Comments

harpers-ferry-may-07-on-stairs2

Today is a rainy, dreary day. I actually love the rain, because it makes everything so green and keeps me from having to water everything! However, when it’s rainy I do take the extra time to “walk safely”. I’m extra careful on stairs, and I stand up slowly. I don’t do anything in a “hurry” that might move my head’s altitude quickly!

Chloe loves to pick things up for me, so I think when she sees me wake up with a little bit of “weave” to my step, she’s actually looking forward to a day of retrieving “every little thing”. Sometimes I don’t need the gum wrapper, or leaf brought in on the bottom of someone’s tennis shoe, but I thank her and praise her just the same. Actually, it’s probably good she brings me everything, for our Elkhound teenager will eat everything!

Meniere’s is not a disease widely known. Even amongst the hearing loss “crowd”, it is just beginning to get a little more “press”. Here are some of my favorite “Meniere’s helps”:

Hearing Loss Web: http://www.hearinglossweb.com/Medical/Meniere/mn.htm

NIDCD: http://www.nidcd.nih.gov/health/balance/meniere.asp

The Meniere’s Page: http://oto2.wustl.edu/men/

Meniere’s Organization: http://www.menieres.org/

Denise Portis

It’s Not Enough

Published on March 29, 2009March 29, 2009 by hearingelmo2 Comments

Denise and Chloe wait for Kyersten to show up at the airport

It’s Not Enough to Love Me

You know Chloe loves people. Chloe loves her trainer and people she knows at Fidos For Freedom. Chloe loves the people I work with and she loves her family. Chloe loves me, and it just isn’t difficult at all for me to “love her back”.

But you know something? It’s not enough for Chloe to simply love me. She’s a working dog, and has a job to do. If all she did was “love me”, I’d still love her as well… but then she’d just be a pet. It is my opinion that even PETS should have good manners, so we teach and enforce basic obedience at home. If Chloe doesn’t obey me at home and when we go out, she isn’t going to be able to do her job.

Because of her job description, it’s not enough for Chloe to love me. She has a job to do and must understand and obey commands. She has learned skills that alert me to sounds that I do not hear, and she assists me by picking up things I’ve dropped. I have a job as well. I not only have to keep her safe, but it is my responsibility to make sure the skills that she has learned are practiced and honed.

It’s great that Chloe loves me, but I have to tell ya… when she obeys a command or successfully performs a skill she has learned and I praise her? She just puffs up and BEAMS with a warmth so bright, that it reaches all the way to my heart and warms me as well.

Distractions Can Interfere

Friday we went to the airport to pick up my daughter who was returning from her spring break in Florida. I put Chloe in a sit/stay, but her paws kept slipping on the slick floor. To make it a little easier for her to succeed at “staying”, I put her in a down/stay. I was really surprised for two seconds to go by and see her POP UP. I didn’t repeat the command, but gently tugged her collar towards the floor until she remembered she was suppose to be in a down/stay. She only stayed there for another two seconds.

I raised my eyebrows and caught my husbands eye. He walked over from where he was sitting to stand nearer to where Chloe and I were. (I don’t think Dads feel compelled to be able to see the doorway from which an absentee child will be coming like a Mom does!)

He said, “Denise, you know the luggage conveyor belt is making a LOT of noise, right? It is buzzing a warning every few seconds to let people know that more luggage is coming up the conveyor”

Oh. Well, umm… NO. I didn’t know that. But at least I knew what was distracting Chloe from being in a down/stay. In order to put her mind at ease, I got down closer to her level and put her in a sit/stay. Now I could feel her tremble every time “that noise” sounded. She just needed a “pat” and “encouragement” that all was going to be ok. She needed to feel my hand.

It’s Not Enough to Love Him

You know? It’s not enough that I love God. I can go around and tell people about how much I love God, but if I am not obeying Him… not fulfilling a purpose for my life, I’m really no good to Him. Sure, He’ll love me back, because that’s what God does… it’s what He is. But if I don’t live my life in such a way that I am obedient to Him, and follow His commands that are MEANT to make me useful to Him, then I’m just one of His kids that happens to love Him.

I want to have a life that counts for something. I want a purpose, and want to make a difference. I want God to use me. If I’m not obeying Him – not loving others, forgiving, being kind, tender-hearted, understanding, etc., then He can’t really use me.

When I know I’m living my life in such a way that He can use me, I know He just looks down with praise. I just puff up and BEAM with a warmth so bright, that I know it’s a reflection of Him.

Distractions Can Interfere

Sometimes I allow worries, problems with other people, or relationships interfere with living my life in such a way that I’m being used by God in a positive way. Sometimes the distractions are really negative things, like extreme bigotry or someone’s prejudice. I don’t care for mean people, and I can very easily allow them to drag me down into a long-term commitment to despise, plot to get even, or wish their downfall.

The reality? A distraction is a distraction. If I’m distracted, I’m not doing Him any good. I’m not doing what He’s called me to do. I can’t make a difference to any one else if I’m distracted by things that do not matter. I’m really glad that I have a personal relationship with God that is ‘real’. I don’t look at God as this impersonal Authority “up there” who rules and controls. When I’m distracted and no good to Him, He gets down and CLOSER. He puts his hand on my back and can feel me tremble. He comforts me and then “I’m good”. I can go back to “work” and do what He’s called me to do. It only takes a touch from His hand.

Denise Portis

They Grow Up so Fast

Published on March 18, 2009 by hearingelmo2 Comments

chloe1baby candid-007

From Puppy to Adult in 2 years

I didn’t know Chloe when she was a puppy. I’m told that she was the perfect puppy and was the brightest “pup in the class”. GRIN. Those of you who KNEW Chloe then, know that I am being deliberately sarcastic. Chloe was incorrigible, and many a trainer wondered if she’d ever GROW UP. Pat J., at Fidos For Freedom told me that, “we just kept seeing little glimmers of what MIGHT BE“. Trainers from the Puppy Program just shake their heads when they see her today. No one was certain she’d make it. Today, she is a mature working dog who honestly loves what she does. Her tail is in a “constant state of wag”.

She and I were walking this evening and I had my cochlear implant on so that I could walk “more safely”. I was amazed at all the birds I could hear, and I could hear a basketball being bounced in the park. I was thinking how “safe” I felt walking with my cochlear implant, when Chloe stopped dead and whirled to face the direction we had come. I looked quickly to see what was up, and there wasn’t anything that I could see to be excited about! Her hair began to stand on end, and she continued to stare behind us. Right when I thought I was going to say, “let’s go Chloe!”, a big black and white pitbull came racing around the corner headed straight for us.

I stepped closer to Chloe and desperately tried to remember which pocket of my pack had the pepper spray. I don’t “remember” very quickly. The pitbull raced up to Chloe and I could hear her growling softly. A boy who looked to be all of 8 or 9-years-old came running after the dog. The dog’s tail was wagging the whole time, but I kept trying to insert my body between the two of them. It didn’t take the boy long to come up and apologetically collect his dog. I continued on my way, but was actually pretty shaken. Here I was thinkin’ I was all of THAT because I was hearing so well! I really would have never known that a dog was coming if not for Chloe. (Something tells me had I been by myself, however, the attraction would not have been so keen!)

Even when she’s not working and “naked” (a.k.a. without her vest), she is a help to me. I really do feel more confident when she is with me. I do not see the “puppy that was” in her big, brown eyes.

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From Baby to Adult in 18 years

Chris is the baby of the family. It is hard to believe he was born over 18 years ago. He barely weighed 4 pounds when he got out of the hospital. Today he is 6 foot, 3 inches tall and is “all growed up”. He goes to community college this fall (as he gets to go FREE thanks to dad), he works part-time and enjoys serving in our church and community.

A couple of years ago, I didn’t know if Chris would “make it” in the transition to adulthood. He lacked the maturity I thought he needed to really succeed in high school. My husband and I kept seeing “little glimmers of what MIGHT BE”. Today, he is a hard-working young adult with a lot of compassion for his fellow man. His tail is in a constant state of… well you know!

Denise Portis

Stupid Is as Stupid Does

Published on March 8, 2009March 8, 2009 by hearingelmo8 Comments

Major tail wag... guess who isn't normally allowed up here?

face-to-face-0021 — What's a dog to do when YOU are down THERE?

Limited by YOUR Barriers

I’ve gone “round and round” about even sharing this with you, as I’ve already caught a lot of GRIEF from my beloved family. I decided to go ahead and post about it, however, because I did learn some things about myself and limitations.

About a week and a half ago, I got what SEEMED like a wonderful idea. I was sitting on my deck drinking my morning tea in the brisk air. Not a cloud in the sky, which meant I was going to have a “good balance day“. Chloe was dozing at my feet. The kids were still in bed. I had a great night’s sleep.

For the past several weeks I had noticed a dead vine hanging on the corner of my house. I also noticed that it was level with the deck in my backyard. Being the intelligent woman that I am (clears throat) I ALSO noticed that it was within arm’s reach of my deck if one was but to “lean a little”. When I first noticed it, my thought was that “I need to get Terry to remove that vine. It bugs me”.

Well sitting there on my deck and feeling particularly FINE, I decided that I would reach around the corner of the deck and grab the vine and jerk it off. Eyesore gone… and I didn’t even have to bother Terry!

Now our deck has a barricade at the staircase, because the stairs are dangerously steep. We plan to replace our deck in the next year, and my biggest “plan of action” is to make a more gradual staircase to the yard below. For now it is barricaded so dogs do not injure themselves going 100 mph down the stairs. (It also keeps ME from thinking I can descend it safely!)

I told Chloe, “Chloe STAY. I’m going to just step over here and grab this vine.”

As soon as I put my leg over the rail of the deck she SHOT out of her sit/stay and looked at me with “fear and trembling“. If she could have said, “What the HECK are ya doin’?” she would have!

I perched on the rail and pointed my finger at her and said, “Chloe! Sit! Down! STAY!” She lay there with her forehead all wrinkled up and eyes wide as I slipped my other leg over the rail. I remember thinking, “She is really a piece of WORK! I mean this is easy, it’ll take me 10 seconds!”

That’s the last thought I had.

Stupid Is as Stupid Does

If a person with hearing loss has a balance disorder as well, it just isn’t smart to do things… UP. High. On. Purpose.

Sigh.

I’m not sure how long I was out. When I came too, I could see Chloe barking from the deck above me. She was no longer in a down/stay. (Obviously, I didn’t fuss at her).

I lay there a minute to evaluate “where it hurt“. It only took a second to realize that it was my leg. A stick was poking out of my calf near my ankle and it certainly hurt!

Here’s a picture of:

STUPID:

LONG-TERM CONSEQUENCES OF STUPID:

Chloe couldn’t get to me, and was barking like crazy. I couldn’t have been out very long, because I’m sure her barking would have eventually woke up one of my kids. She has a really loud hound bark, (not at ALL feminine!).

Barriers Put Up by ME

As I sat there pulling the stick out of my leg I began to talk to Chloe. As I talked, she stopped barking and just sat there looking down at me with a look of panic on her face.

The real dilemma? All the doors were locked! I was going to have to get to the staircase across the yard, get up the steps and over the semi-permanent barrier we had erected “for safety’s sake”. The door from the deck to the house was the only one unlocked. I could have knocked, but the metal security door under the deck to our laundry room is solid and doesn’t produce a very loud knock.

To make a very long … somewhat boring story – SHORTER (grin), I made it inside. It took me awhile, and I had to find my cochlear implant before even starting on the “trip”! Chloe whined her encouragement the entire way.

My kids were pretty surprised to come upstairs for breakfast to find me with my foot in the air with ice on it. Ok… actually I’m stretching the truth here. My kids know me. They weren’t at ALL surprised to come upstairs to find me with my foot in the air and ice on it.

They DID call dibs on who got to call “Dad” and tell him what happened.

Barriers Can be Good

I put up that barrier for a reason. It should have been a reminder to me just how high off the ground I was. The barrier was to serve as a preventative for descending to the yard below from the deck. By-passing the stairs all together was just a little bit STUPID. That barrier should have served as a reminder AND a preventative.

Sometimes we put up barriers in our lives to protect ourselves. Maybe you’ve learned the hard way to avoid critical people. You put up a block… a barrier to not allow people like that close to you. The barrier can keep people who aren’t “safe” for you emotionally, at a distance that is healthier for YOU.

But why do we sometimes slip a leg over the railing to by-pass the barrier? Why do we seem to embrace people who have a history of causing us emotional duress? Perhaps someone with an expression like Chloe’s, looks on in concern and asks carefully, “do you know what it is you are doing?” Ignoring the possibility that they may be right, you slip your leg over the rail anyway and think, “Gee! They are a piece of WORK!”

Friends? The only work is that long walk “home” after falling on your butt. It may take years even to get back to a healthy place. Almost “home“, and you step over a familiar looking barrier that you had up as a warning and preventative prior to being duped again.

Safe People

Surround yourself with “safe people“. These folks are individuals who bring out the best in you. They love you warts and all. They are an encouragement to you, and cheer lead you to reach for your dreams.

What’s tough is when some of those people who aren’t safe are related to you. There are times you have to interact, but you can learn to do so in a way that they don’t breach even the barriers you put up for them.

I am not encouraging an unforgiving heart either. If someone is truly repentant (meaning they have made a CHANGE) and want to be a friend to you again, you should be willing to trust they mean it. If their efforts fail, however, and they still are a “toxic person”, at least you have the experience and “supplies handy” to put that barrier right back up.

Sigh.

You know the BOOGER of it?

That. Vine. Is. Still. There.

Denise Portis

Reflections from Baby Mirrors

Published on March 6, 2009March 6, 2009 by hearingelmo1 Comment

Baby Mirrors for Vans

I had only been matched with Chloe about a month, when I overheard another client from Fidos For Freedom say she had a “baby mirror” in her van. She, too, was late-deafened, and she explained that having the “baby mirror” attached to the rear-view mirror, added confidence about how her canine partner was doing “back there“.

I took a picture of Chloe at work yesterday next to the mirror. (It cracks me up that the Chloe BOBBLE-HEAD made it in the picture too… it’s a long story. I needed a quick way to identify MY silver van from everyone else’s!) Normally, Chloe is in the seat in the far back of the van. She has a special seatbelt, as well as a “sling” that zips her up in order to keep her from sliding on the floor should I make a sudden stop.

Because I have a hearing loss, I depend on that mirror to help me see Chloe. I suppose you could say I hear pretty good with my eyes. The peace of mind this little mirror has brought to me, was well worth the $4.99 that I paid for it at Wal-mart.

The reflection I view in that handy little mirror, gives me confidence and assurance about the well-being of my dog. I see her at a different angle, and can evaluate whether or not I need to speak to her or praise her.

Baby Mirrors for Life

I think too much. Perhaps it’s because I’m married to a Psychologist; or, it may be that as my oldest daughter is a Psychology major, I’m encouraged to THINK. I often “reflect” when I enter a really effective quiet time of thinking/evaluating my life. To reflect is to think seriously about and ponder the past. (This according to my own understanding of the word that is!) Confucius said, “By three methods we may learn wisdom: first, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third, by experience, which is most bitter.” I want to be noble.

I’ve discovered that it’s the “baby mirrors”of life… the angles, or viewpoints that are not a direct line of sight, that give me the best perspective of where I am and how I am functioning.

I suppose an obvious question we ask ourselves when we are evaluating “how are we doin’?” would be, “Am I happy?” However, happiness is not JOY, and the latter is what lasts… what gives us real peace.

FIERCE JOY

A friend of mine writes at a wonderful blog entitled: “The Grace and Wonder of God“. She recently wrote a post called, “Fierce Glory“. I’ll let you read the post, because frankly she said it much better than I could. Sometimes her posts end up on the back burner of my mind – just a simmerin’ away while I contemplate the truths she shared along side of the the reality of my own life.

There are times in my life where I feel desperately unhappy. Those times often occur during times that I put my eyes on “self” and have major PITY PARTIES that family and friends are encouraged to attend. Reality bites, and the “norm” is that I’m at that party all by myself.

I don’t think it’s wrong to acknowledge that sometimes we just aren’t happy. But happiness is a choice (it’s even the title of a great book!). If I need to feel unhappy for awhile, that’s OK. It’s not OK to LIVE THERE. Even in the midst of feeling unhappy, I can and should have joy.

Life can suck. (grin) My joy is not dependent on whether or not I am happy. It’s deeper than that. When God changed me, that inner part of me morphed into a confident child of the King. As a matter of fact, sometimes when I’m really feeling unhappy, what turns that around for me is simply being reminded of my joy. I am FIERCELY joyful.

Heck! The price Christ paid to make sure I had that peace… that assurance, was too high to act as if it is temporary. The reminder of why I have TRUE joy, feels like a fire rising up within my very soul. My tearful, depressed, worry-bent spine is lifted and straightened with the power of that knowledge. Perhaps it’s a little bit like that saying, “I am WOMAN, hear me ROAR!” I am HIS, I have JOY.

Lack of Joy is a Red Flag

I was recently contacted by someone through my blog. She is 33-years-old and has started to lose her hearing. Just as she makes adjustments in her life and “finds peace”, her hearing fluctuates and she’s back to “square one”. She admitted to me that the constant battle to “stay sane” is wearing her out. She has thought about how easy it would be to give up the fight. After probing a little bit, she admitted that this could mean “dropping out of life”, or even “taking her life”. (By the way, I have her permission to share this without using her name of course).

I’ve been there. Trying to constantly adapt can wear the starch out of any of us. An acquired disability that is in a constant state of “change” can make someone feel like “givin’ it up”.

In January of 2003, I was “there”. I had just lost more of my hearing and was having trouble communicating with even those closest to me. I was alone in my car headed to a meeting at my church. I remember thinking, “Wow. It would be so easy to just turn the wheel and drive off the interstate at 65 mph. It would be over quickly. No work involved. Those who might miss me would get over it quickly.” It scared me spitless that I found myself there. Perhaps that is why God continues to put people in my life who are also “there”. I “get them”, for I’ve lived that same roller coaster of thought.

It took the reminder of why I have JOY, that I began to “see past today”. If you do not have JOY, you may never find that true peace all of us yearn for in our lives. If you can STAY unhappy, and truly have no reason to exist – take my word for it that this is a RED flag.

Don’t Primp – Look!

Get a “baby mirror” for your life. Stop your primping. Don’t just look at what everyone else sees. Look past that. Check out the different angles that are “you”. Do you have joy? Are you unhappy too much? What do the answers to those questions tell you about your reflection?

I’ll close out this long-winded post with a great song one of my students signed in class recently. I love the words to the song. I’m not a huge Christian Aguilera fan, but the girl can SING.

“Reflection”

Look at me
You may think you see
Who I really am
But you’ll never know me
Every day
It’s as if I play a part
Now I see
If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

I am now
In a world where I
Have to hide my heart
And what I believe in
But somehow
I will show the world
What’s inside my heart
And be loved for who I am

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection
Someone I don’t know?
Must I pretend that I’m
Someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

There’s a heart that must be
Free to fly
That burns with a need to know
The reason why

Why must we all conceal
What we think, how we feel?
Must there be a secret me
I’m forced to hide?
I won’t pretend that I’m
Someone else for all time
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

Denise Portis

Passing with FLYING Colors

Published on March 1, 2009March 1, 2009 by hearingelmo7 Comments

aquarium-007

Dolphin Show? Nooooo Problem!

We’ve been to the National Aquarium in Baltimore since my “match” with Chloe, but I choose to sit out during the Dolphin Show. We were “new enough” that I did not know what to expect. This past Saturday we met some new friends at the Aquarium. After soliciting the advice and opinions of fellow Fidos For Freedom folks (geesh… say that 5 times really fast!), I decided to take Chloe to the Dolphin Show. I went a little early so I could pick my own seat. I knew I didn’t want in the “Splash Zone”, but I also did not want to sit as close as where the hearing assistive section was situated. I hear “voices” well enough with my CI, so I decided we’d sit where it was best for CHLOE.

This decision meant in the back and up HIGH – grin! With my poor balance, it took some quickly whispered prayers, Chloe’s steady counter-balance, and a husband walking immediately behind my weaving, dizzy, umm…. BEHIND, for me to get where I felt “safe” for Chloe’s sake.

aquarium-005 Most of the time she stayed down on her blanket, and I was not even forced to reinforce the behavior with her treats. She was OK until she heard the dolphins making sounds. I couldn’t hear it, of course, but my husband said they chattered, chirped and made other interesting noises. Chloe would “pop up” to take a look, but would immediately go back down when I reminded her to do so.

At one point, the crowd burst into applause and exclaimed, “OH!” very loudly. Chloe popped up to take a look, and I found her staring in astonishment! A dolphin was doing the “high jump”, where it burst from the water to touch a ball extended high above the water. If Chloe’s jaw could have dropped open, I’m sure it would have. (I did have to ask her twice after that to go back to a “down”!)

Chloe did great at the Aquarium. aquarium-001 I suppose the biggest “chore” was just keeping her from being stepped on by the crowds, and insuring she was in a “safe place”. I had to put her in “place” a couple of times (opposite of “heel”, to the right). I can’t leave her there very long due to…

… As the World Turns

Meniere’s disease is different in every individual. Although symptoms may be similar, they are never identical. Some people develop Meniere’s along WITH unexplained hearing loss, some people have it without any evidence of hearing loss at all! Some people experience tinnitus (ringing, buzzing, whistling), nausea, dizziness, vertigo, blackouts, blurred vision, and much more.

In a simple, layman’s description: my world spins counter-clockwise. With Chloe in “heel” (although a modified one as she is slightly forward of a formal “heel” due to my inability to see lower, left peripherally), she actually provides a “check” to my slowly, moving world. As my visual field and brain cause me to feel as if I’m spinning left, her “brace” in “heel” sort of SNAPS my visual field back to where it belongs. She is standing, or sitting STILL, which allows my focus to re-establish center as I am NOT “sitting still”. When she is in “place” however, her body isn’t in a position where it enters my counter-clockwise “spin”. Confusing? (grin) Try explaining the individuality of Meniere’s someday!

Let’s just say I’m glad she is in “heel” MOST of the time. I practice “place” and “circle right” as they are occasionally needed.

All So “Normal” for Us

We also went to the shops near the Aquarium, and then waited for about 45 minutes to eat at The Cheesecake Factory. I can hear voices in quiet environments at normal speaking levels. I cannot hear voices in places with a great deal of background noise, nor can I hear whispered things. I tend to miss all of the exclamations from the general public when they see Chloe do something for me.

When she rolls her own blanket up for me so that it is high enough to reach, or picks up her own leash to hand it to me, I do not give it a 2nd thought anymore. She picks up the end of my cane until it’s high enough for me to grab, picks up dropped items like menus or pamphlets, and just has a GRAND time doing it! Although my family are also accustomed to Chloe being by my side and “helping”, they hear those comments that I do not when we are in a new place.

What can be really fun is to see the look on everyone’s face when I remove Chloe’s vest outside for a short break. My dog morphs into “Miss Congeniality”.

Something is ALWAYS Learned

Even when everything does NOT go as smoothly as Saturday did, I still learn important lessons. The least significant lesson may be a reminder of what should be worked on with more diligence. “Reality checks” are great teachers.

Having a working dog does not mean that I do not have to WORK at adapting. My cochlear implant allows me to hear, and yet I am still deaf. I use a bright purple cane, but I still fall sometimes. Chloe acts as my ears, but I will still misunderstand even a noise I am alerted to at times! How we react when everything does NOT go “great” is a good measure of how we are “really” coping with an acquired disability.

Tomorrow I may have a different opinion, but right now I think I’m “passing with FLYING colors!

Denise Portis

The Vest is Really Always “On”

Published on February 26, 2009February 26, 2009 by hearingelmo3 Comments

harpers-ferry-october-2008-at-river

All Work and No Play?

Chloe doesn’t wear her vest in the house, and I sometimes take her to places where the “vest” stays in the van. Harper’s Ferry is one of those places… although I make her wear it if we are there during “peak” season because the crowds are so large. Lucky for us we live close enough that we go frequently, and normally NOT during peak season!

It’s good for her to “just be a dog” sometimes. And yet… Chloe doesn’t “turn off” her training when she does not have her vest. On the contrary, she does MOST of her hearing alerts when her vest is hanging up by the front door! I work 4 days a week from home, and so when the phone rings, kitchen timer beeps, or doorbell dings, she alerts me to the fact and “takes me there”. Even at Harpers Ferry we discovered she still realized I couldn’t hear well and would alert when “vest-less”. It was at Harpers Ferry that we first realized that she alerts the same and takes me to whomever calls “Denise” OR “Mom”.

Chloe gets plenty of playtime, but she really seems to “get” that regardless of that vest, I need her ears.

I Feel NAKED!

There have been a few times when I left Chloe at home and went to something without her. When my daughter (who has a horrible phobia of needles) went to get blood work prior to starting college, she needed my undivided attention. As a matter of fact, she not only needed my attention, but also both hands and a knee to keep her propped up after swooning. The girl hates needles!

When our family went to Catoctin Wildlife Preserve, I wisely left Chloe at home. It’s not a great idea to take a working dog to a place where things would think she was “dinner”.

On these rare occasions, I have felt positively NAKED without that leash in my hands. I am so accustomed to her presence and help, I feel very strange indeed to be without her. My husband is always glad to have her along as well, for he gets a little irritated when I slip up and tell him to “heel“.

It’s Great Knowing She Likes to Work

We were at the bank today taking care of some business for our chapter of the Hearing Loss Association of America. As I sat waiting for the woman I needed to see, Chloe stayed in a nice down/stay at my feet. We finally were able to go back and see the woman we had an appointment with, but were stopped by a man waiting in line. He had big tears in his eyes and he told me how beautiful Chloe was and, “… she just adores you! She watches you non-stop… every move you make! She only looks away when someone new walks into the bank and she flops her tail at them and then turns to stare at you again!”

Chloe loves people, and loves to work. That has to rank right up there to being one of the most important things about a working dog… that they love to work.

My “Spiritual” Vest is Always “ON”

Hopefully I’m a person of faith who lives what I believe even outside of Sunday morning services. I try to be “real” and genuine. My faith has become such an ingrained part of who I am, it’s impossible to separate the two. I get some “good natured flack” from time to time about mentioning my faith on the blog so much. However, I’m here and functioning as well as I do as a direct result of my relationship with Christ. I can’t pretend to be something I’m not, and I’ve completely HIS.

Sure, sometimes my mouth negates the fact I am a person of faith. When I sin? It’s ALWAYS with my mouth. My prayer every morning before my feet hit the floor is “Lord, guard my tongue today!” I pray He can use this big mouth for some good. I’m grateful He does not call the ‘qualified‘, rather He ‘qualifies” the called. May I always live like my “vest” is on!

My Teacher Hat is Always On

I guess because I’m a teacher, it’s really hard for me not to be in “teacher mode”. The kids tease me sometimes about making “everything into a learning session”. From correcting their grammar when speaking, to insisting on learning the history and background of a place we are visiting for the day, I end up in a “did ya know?” speech nine times out of ten!

Now that I’ve started back to school myself with the goal of eventually teaching on the community college level, that will likely get even worse. I’m working towards my Masters in Psychology. I noticed on the online biography “background” page, that I’m the only one pictured in my profile with a dog. (smile)

She’s THAT much a part of my life…

Denise Portis

“Worry” is the Darkroom in Which “Negatives” can Develop

Published on February 22, 2009February 22, 2009 by hearingelmo4 Comments

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Chloe in her new “Gentle Leader” harness

chloe-gl-002 Oops… the strap is a little crooked!

Hounds a-Worryin’ Over It!

Premier Pets did a DEMO for Fidos For Freedom on Saturday. I registered in advance, and for my efforts received a “Gentle Leader” harness just for attending. Chloe and I use a “plastic prong” collar for training and “work”, although it is rarely needed now that we’ve been working together for so long. I still utilize it because to Chloe it means “I’m working” as much as her vest does. If someone who is illiterate notices her and tries to coax her close for some petting, I need only gently pull and release and she immediately remembers to stay in a nice sit/stay. Numerous teams at Fidos For Freedom use the “Gentle Leader” however, so since I was going to get one free I wasn’t going to argue!

Chloe is NOT thrilled with it. Honestly, when I first put it on her, her EYES ACTUALLY CROSSED looking down at the strap on her nose! I laughed hysterically, which hurt my poor hound dog’s feelings. After apologizing, I adjusted straps and made sure the fit was right… begged for some 2nd opinions, and then walked her around the training center for about 20 minutes. I’m sure if I NEEDED the control of the “Gentle Leader”, she would become accustomed to it fairly quickly.

For that first 20 minutes, she “worried” over it almost obsessively. She followed commands, but even when in “heel” tried to rub it off against my leg! When we stopped, she’d use her paw and try to slip it over the edge of her nose! (A proper fit insures this cannot be done!) Bottom line, the harness looked lovely on her, but her attitude was peeved. She “worried” over it until our stops in a “sit/stay” had her pouting and turning her head away from me. After about fifteen minutes, her tail was even drooping. “Worry” had quickly cultivated real “negative weeds” in the heart and mind of my friendly working dog! In the end, she was just TICKED OFF. Right before we left I slipped it off of her so I could get her to “hurry up” (potty) before loading her in the van for the long trip home. As soon as the harness was removed she began kissing me in “thanks” and even whining her heartfelt gratitude!

I’ve made sure she’s had it on a little bit at home, but again as I don’t see a NEED for it right now… “don’t try to fix what ain’t broke“. Who knows? I may have a need for it one day.

People a-Worrin’ Over it!

I’m many times like my hound dog. I can “worry” over things that are new, and not completely to my liking. It may be something new that can’t be helped. So exactly what good is accomplished over worryin’ over it?

The past week we’ve been blessed with some beautiful dustings of snow in the mornings. I just love snow. I love the way it feels in my hands and under my boots. I love the way it looks as it falls in big white flakes, or swirling in the wind of a near blizzard. I love shoveling snow. (Aren’t I insane?) I like the sound the snow shovel makes when it hits, lifts and displaces the snow. I love looking behind me at the “path” I’ve created and feel a sense of accomplishment equaling the birth of a child. (OK, yeah… that’s a stretch!) Snow doesn’t affect my vertigo and balance the way rain does. At least until this past week…

I have had some “near misses” in falls, and have had some real trouble in my balance during this week. I’ve been a little peeved about it. Peeved to the point that I’ve been a little bit snippy. When I realized I was reacting in a fairly negative way to almost everything, I tried to reflect on what the problem might be. After a little “self-discovery” of the underlying cause, I vowed to change my attitude then and there! I mean? Why worry over something that cannot be changed?

A New Normal

For me, this is just part of my “new normal”. It is normal for me to have bad “balance days”. It is normal for me not to hear well in crowded places. However, I can adapt and make necessary changes in order to live my life with passion, respect, and value. If I do all I can to be healthy, then on days I find I’m staggering around, I must accept as part of my “new normal”.

If I get angry, depressed and negative about it, I end up with family members trying to decide “what is UP with HER?” Hubby asks, “Are you PMS’ing?” (The only reason they even call it PMS is because Mad Cow Disease was taken.) How smart is it to say something like that? It did snap me back for a second however, to see what THEY were seeing. It was the impetus I needed to do some soul-searching.

I can worry 24/7 and nothing positive will come of it. On the contrary, negative thinking tends to choke out every rational thought I have. And frankly? I need to stay focused and rational about my problems! Evaluating, weighing, and finding solutions to problems is a whole lot different than worryin’ over them.

Denise Portis